Theoretically, I am an introvert—yes, one of millions, groundbreaking.
But wait, what is introversion, you ask? “The state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life.”
Welp. That sounds a bit less charming and way more selfish than I thought—thanks dictionary.
After reading about introversion, I learned that you don’t have to be just introverted or just extroverted. Some say that the two are cyclical, a sliding scale, a flow of energy in and out.
Thing is, this sliding scale of energy—or whatever—can be disruptive to your office reputation. I regularly sway on the side of introversion. Often, I’m not mentally present during meetings, I’m avoiding talking to officemates, and no, I brought my lunch today and I’m going to eat it here, at my desk, with my headphones on. Thanks-for-the-invite, talk-to-you-later-bye.
Now, I’m not saying participation at work is necessary — and if it’s not, let me know how I can get a job where you work, thanks. But, if you’re teetering between entry-level and management, or you’re new and you want to build a presence, you probably need to do more than work quietly at your desk. Yes, yes, this is very unfortunate for us self-diagnosed introverts.
If you’re often asked one of these questions, you should probably continue reading: Why didn’t you say anything at that meeting? Why are you so quiet? What do you think? What do I think? Ugh, I don’t know, whatever Linda said, that sounds good. I’m busy.
Luckily, I’ve had some great managers who have given me some tips and tricks for building a presence at work, even when I am feeling introverted.
- Say something at every meeting. You don’t have to say anything earth-shattering, you just have to say something. Here’s a few tips on conquering this one:
- Prepare for the meeting. 15 minutes before it starts, write down some notes about the topics and think of three questions that you can ask.
- Be the first one there and make small talk. Try to be the first to the meeting and greet people when they walk in. Make small talk with the person to your left and right before the meeting starts.
- Ask those questions you prepared. Questions are the easiest way to engage during a meeting. It makes you seem more like a contributor and eager to learn.
- Be present. Close your computer! Take notes! Yes, with a pen and paper. Actively listen to the conversation and be ready to jump in with a question or comment.
- Ask questions. A repeat, I know, but this is my go-to strategy in every social situation. People love answering questions and talking about themselves—they just love it. And building a natural sense of curiosity is really easy. It works for many different people in the office:
- Your boss. Ask your manager their opinion. What did you think of that meeting? What do you think about the new XYZ? How do you think that fits into our strategy? This is such an easy way to learn and build a relationship.
- Your teammates. Ask teammates what they’re working on, and make a note to check back in. Ask questions about the project, their approach, the tools they are using. Learn and you build a presence — win-win.
- Cross-departmental co-workers. Same idea goes for cross-departmental co-workers. What are you working on? What big projects are coming up? How’s that new client? You can learn a lot about what’s happening at the company and build relationships with your coworkers. Did I use win-win already?
- Watercooler talk, have something to say. I work at a tech company, so watercooler talk primarily consists of sports considering 75%—no 90% of the people who work there are men. I don’t like sports. But, that doesn’t mean I can’t contribute. For those of us on public transit, on your way into work do some reading. If you’re in the car, queue up NPR or a podcast. Favorites:
- Conversation starters/contribution podcasts — Stuff You Should Know, This American Life, Missing Richard Simmons (this will come in handy, I promise).
- News — NPR. I won’t plug anything else here because #fakenews, and stuff.
- Reddit — If you’re not spending one-third of your day on Reddit, what are you doing with your life?
- Greet your colleagues, every day. No brainer, speaks for itself, and it’s super easy.
- Respond to email chains. We all get those super obnoxious email chains — New client! Company goal! Blah-blah’s birthday! And some people CC everyone to say “congrats! We did it”. And, yeah, that’s kind of annoying, but those people are visible, even if just for a moment. You should do that, too.
Before you go, just remember to be aware of your energy levels. You’re not going to walk into work every day with all the energy. But that’s ok! Don’t beat yourself up for feeling low. Recognize your feelings, greet them with kindness. Don’t put yourself into a situation where your energy isn’t going to be on your side.
And if some days you need to eat lunch at your desk with your headphones on, I’m not judging you.